Weekly Caption Contest
Winning Entry:
Online, nobody knows you're the Pope.... - Kevin Jacox.
Also-Rans (in no particular order):
"Can we put this thing on a riser or something? I can't look very holy when I have to sit like this." - Adam Kalsey.
"Ahh... Britney Spears... this is better then the HBO Special!" - Wendy Berg.
"I wish I could excommunicate that stupid paperclip!" - Mark Mills.
"I'm 26, 6'2", 195 and HUNG! How about you?" - Kevin Jacox.
www.nunnbush.com - Jeffrey Harris.
Ipse Dixit, my ass! What in the hell is this blogging crap about?" - Brent Thurman.
The cardinals, eager for their chance at anointment, encourage the pope to beta test Microsoft's new Papal Upgraded XP. - Aaron Johnson.
Hmm... Ipse Dixit.... This might be interesting... - Chris O'Donnell.
"I bless this web site in the name of the Father, the Son and the - Holy Cow! - look at the tits on that one!" - Mark Mills.
holyone112: Whats Up?
lildevil666: IM trying to figure out how 2 take over the world. U?
holyone112: Me 2
lildevil666: k gg
holyone112: Me 2, mass is starting. bbl
- Amy Richard.
"I've never understood the attraction of porn... Hmm. Would you look at that?" - Adam Kalsey.
"Hmm.... This Atomica sure is fun. That Dodd Harris is a genius!" - Wendy Berg.
The Pope fights hard not to laugh as he sends his latest joke to his email list: "Q: How do you get a nun pregnant? A: Dress her up like an Altar Boy!" - Brent Thurman.
"Um, what is ICQ, Cardinal? And why is xxxhot13yearold asking for A/S/L?" - Mark Mills.
Thanks to all who entered. See the main blog for this week's Contest Photo.
Now this would make a fine Christmas gift! Which to choose? The small plastic dolls or the life-size plastic dolls...?
Weekly Caption Contest
Winning Entry:
How he got stuck with the hibachi role in the new rock opera still escaped him. - Mark Mills.
Also-Rans (in no particular order):
Genesis attempts to carry on without Peter Gabriel and Phil Collins. - Brent Thurman.
"No! That is where the extinguisher is and that is where I'm going to fall down screaming. Lets get it right this time - I'm running out of hair." - Mark Mills.
Hoping to regain the spotlight, an aging and insane Bruce Springsteen trying to prove that he's still "The Boss" by adding a new twist to his song "I'm On Fire". - John Paul Straub.
Going out in a blaze of glory has never been so easy! - Mark Mills.
Osama bin Laden in his pre-terrorist days as lead singer for Spinal Tap. - Brent Thurman.
"Damn you, Neil Young! Fading away was better!!!" - Mark Mills.
Thanks to all who entered. See the main blog for this week's Contest Photo.
This year's recipient of the annual Presidential Turkey Pardon was a bit more grateful than President Bush had anticipated.
Submitted Alternatives:
Knob Gobbler. - Aaron Johnson.
"No sir, you're thinking of chicken. Don't choke the turkey, sir." - Mark Mills.
"A story about a turkey, a story about a fowl deed... and like Clinton's story there is also a fat bird in it." - Mark Mills.
Weekly Caption Contest
Winning Entry:
After spending 30 years in space, Laika the canine Soviet Cosmonaut returns home only to find that the Soviet Union has been dissolved... and is carried off by the new regime, to be tried as a dissident. - Andy Faris.
Also-Rans (in no particular order):
Buddy, mascot of the Heaven's Gate cult, was not permitted to leave his vehicle and enter the next level.... - Kevin Jacox.
"Sigfreid and Roy, The Trailer Days" - all this week on Biography. - Mark Mills.
With Anthrax hysteria in full swing, Fido is taking no chances during the trip to the Vet. - Chris O'Donnell.
*kzzct* "Houston, we have a bitch. Repeat, we have a bitch." - Mark Mills.
"Nipples, nutsac, head in a bucket, and I'm named 'Lucky!' I'm jumping infront of a gas truck!" - Matt Loomis.
Letting the dog eat biscuits directly from the jar seemed like a good idea at the time.... - Kevin Jacox.
Rejected art for the new "Hang In There" poster. - Mark Mills.
"Oh, shit! Now my picture's gonna be on Ipse Dixit!" - Kevin Jacox.
You've heard of Bubble Boy... but have you met "Bubble DOG?" - Amy Richard.
Yet another tragic cultural aftereffect of the movie Bubble Boy - Mark Mills.
Thanks to all who entered. See the main blog for this week's Contest Photo.
Weekly Caption Contest
Winning Entry:
After visiting Ipse Dixit, Tom Ridge clicked over to play Atomica. 12 hours later, this is the result. - Kevin Jacox.
Also-Rans (in no particular order):
How in the hell does Spock do that? - Brent Thurman.
"Es mi barrio, homes!" - Kevin Jacox.
"Bioterrorism now includes your burrito habit, Cheney..." - Mark Mills.
"...and you may ask yourself how did I get this beautiful wife?" - Franco Scalzo.
"Uh...George....where'd my breasts go?" - Kevin Jacox.
"She's got huge... tracts of land..." - Jeffrey Harris.
"No, if they are this big, we really do consider them weapons now. You know those things explode at high altitude, right?" - Mark Mills.
"Then I hoist the giant hamburger over my head and smile real big. Keep in mind I'd be doing this in red and white checkered overalls, not a suit." - Caleb Brown.
"Um, that guy over there... in the turban... is he really from the Associated Press?" - Kevin Jacox.
After the operation, Mr. Ridge will be known as "Ms. Mountains." - Mark Mills.
"...and she has... huge tracts of land...." - Amy Richard.
" Her name was Loretta Gorgonzola and man did she have some kozangas!" - Franco Scalzo.
The period of cooperation appears to be over as Senate, House, and Cabinet members once again begin publicly flashing gang signs. - Mark Mills.
Thanks to all who entered. See the main blog for this week's Contest Photo.
Weekly Caption Contest
Winning Entry:
"Oh my God! They just Killed Osama!" "You bastards!" - Kevin Jacox.
Also-Rans (in no particular order):
"With an autumn complexion like Muja here, you probably want to stick with either black or white for the eyepatch." - Mark Mills.
"I'm not touching you...I'm not touching you...." - Kevin Jacox.
Bang. Bang.... Too bad it's only charades. - Dave Pell.
"He did it! I was not even in the bathroom!" - Tamara Ralston.
"See Ralphie, Santa was right, if you get a BB gun for Christmas you'll shoot your eye out." - Sarah Mueller.
"Dude! Dude! Smell my finger!" - Mark Mills.
"Hey, be careful where you point that thing - you could put an eye out!" - Kellye Johnson.
"Holy shit! Something has taken up residence in your turban!" - Kevin Jacox.
""He did it... he's the only one with the magic markers." - Jeffrey Harris.
"Boys, Boys! You remember what happens when you two start pointing? I know you do Kalidh." - Mark Mills.
"You'd better look away, before I pop out that other eye and skull fuck you again! Punk-ass uzbek bitches ain't got no heart. West Side!"- Matt Loomis.
"Given the tragic loss of your first eye, the loss of the second would be most inconvenient. Do you want me to poke it for you to be sure it's in there securely?" - Sarah Mueller.
"See his eye? this is what happens when you ignore the terrorist shop safety rules. For those of you who need a refresher, a video starring Norm Abram is available in the Taliban gift shop." - Kevin Jacox.
"The first evidence of civilian casualties didn't have the effect that the Taliban was looking for..." - Jeffrey Harris.
"Or, if you don't like the mural, I could just shoot you." - Mark Mills.
"I'm with stupid." - Aaron Johnson.
"Do a little dance.... make a little love.... Tal-i-ban tonite! Tal-i-ban tonite!" - Kevin Jacox.
Dr. Hook and Cat Stevens announce their 2001 World Tour. - Frank Scalzo.
Islamic law dictates that anyone caught having sex with a camel in public shall have their hair singed with a blowtorch and one eye gouged out. - Brent Thurman.
It's all fun and games until Mohammad pokes your eye out. - Amy Richard.
"Hey, you! Get away from the Slurpee machine!" - Kevin Jacox.
"Tag!" - Mark Mills.
"It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye." - Jeffrey Harris.
"Put that away before someone loses an eye!" - Dawn Garrett.
Thanks to all who entered. See the main blog for this week's Contest Photo.
